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“Send a different waitress over!”I knew she wouldn’t, because I knew she LIKED the banter and silliness. I was also reasonably sure that she DID want to go to bed with me, but she was in such a state that she’d never admit it. And that was fine with me. I was enjoying myself.“No, despite being annoying, you always leave a very good tip!”“If you like the tip, you’ll like the whole thing even better!” I smirked.“What is it with you?!” she asked, exasperated. “Are you going to twist EVERYTHING I say into some kind of innuendo?”“Absolutely! In fact, I believe every word or phrase in English can be used as innuendo! It’s because, in general, Americans are so repressed, and so prudish, that we ONLY use innuendo instead of just coming right out and saying it!”“And you’re that direct?”“Yes, but I’m not a complete idiot! I don’t go up to a random girl at a party and ask if she wants to have sex! But once it’s clear she’s interested, then sure, why not be direct about it?!”“You think I’M. We got a brandnew color television for the family room. I had suddenly developed ataste for soap operas at that time. I usually scheduled my sewing forone o'clock in the afternoon for what I called, "My Story". I wasquietly having a glass of iced tea, watching my story, while working ontwo dresses. One was Debbie's ballet costume and one was the Laura'scheerleader uniform, both needed mending. I was wearing my lime greensummer dress and a more frillier pinafore when Laura and her girlfriendand fellow cheerleader, Lisa came bursting in. On seeing me in my dressand pinafore sewing both went immediately slack jawed in surprise. "Ohmy god, Billy why are you in that dress? You look like a dang girl. Areyou gay or something?"I didn't know how to respond. Thank god Mom just walked in with herglass of iced tea. Mom and I relaxed together in the afternoon forlunch and our daily soap opera. "Laura, leave your brother alone thisinstant. The new law in this house is simple. Your brother and I do.
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